Anne Hill tagged me for a meme called, Passion Quilt.
The rules of the meme are thus:

• Post a picture or make/take/create your own that captures what YOU are most passionate for students to learn about.
• Give your picture a short title.
• Title your blog post “Meme: Passion Quilt.”
• Link back to this blog entry.
• Include links to 5 (or more) educators.

Where Now?Considering all the pain and misery I have been excavating from my body, passion till a few days ago was in short supply. Then it happened, what always happens, the myriad threads coalesced and suddenly what had seemed hopelessly unraveled became whole.

It all started with a catalog from the Pacifica Graduate Institute. I had an earlier one safely hidden in plain sight so I could pretend I was not looking at it longingly from across the room. Then just as that bit of denial started to “work”, damn if they did not send another, even more beautiful one, in the mail. It was bad enough that they sent me countless incredibly beautiful brochures for all their upcoming workshops, but now here in my hot little hands was a brand spanking new catalog of whispering dreams and dazzlingly promises all laid out for me to behold, lust over and with trembling hands, finger each page. So I did what any card carrying warrior mystic would do. I left it in its clear(!) envelope on the floor, under the chair, right where I could see it but not touch it.

And there it stayed till my coven sister Rose arrived, started laughing, and picked it up. Damn her! She then opened it and began turning the pages while I sat watching her with downcast eyes, murmuring profanities to myself.

“What’s that, Katrina?”

“Um, huh? Oh nothing …”

[laughter], “Un-huh?”

“Bitch!”

[laughter]

We then had one of those conversations about my hiding from an obvious message about my deep passion for myth, magick and mystery. And I finally succumbed and drank in the catalog with such delight, ecstasy and reverie.

And so over the next week, I investigated, reflected, journaled and prayed. And to the amusement of many of my close friends, I admitted that, yes I am a mystic who is passionate about myth, archetypes and deep mystery. And, that I need this pursuit in my life. And although I cannot afford the six-figure cost of a Pacifica doctorate in Mythological Studies (drool), I am not so sure I need the degree either.

It is a lot like my previous pursuit of a doctorate from MIT. Back in the nineties, I had similarly lusted over descriptions of the Ph.d program at the MIT Media Lab. I remembered how that interest led to my starting Amber Eyes. I did not need the Media Lab to pursue my interest in interactive technologies or to become a web designer.

I realize that Pacifica for me is a lot like MIT. It represents an unfulfilled passion. I could focus on the school or I could focus on the passion. Of course, if a full scholarship should suddenly drop into my lap, well guess who coming to California? And I will attend workshops, as I am able. But this lover of myth is going to make room in her life for the serious pursuit of her passion – Myths, Magick & Mystery. I will still gladly browse course offerings and other opportunities, but I am not putting this pursuit on hold because I cannot afford tuition – I will pursue this passion no matter what.

And this is what I am passionate about teaching my students. Follow your bliss, yes. But follow it, not the ways it gets your attention. Too often, I notice folks grabbing onto things, structures, techniques, titles and almost anything outside of themselves. I understand that it may seem essential especially for extroverts. But what I want my students to comprehend is that the true compass always lies within - not in your fears, your stories, your weaknesses or your projections, but in your passion. Follow your passion. And it will always point to your true north.

And I tag Chelidon, Ivo, Helena, Angela and Eridanus.

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