These next two goals concern my work as an artist, teacher and priestess.
Share My Writings, Music, Art And Message With A Wider Audience
This goal was the hardest to craft. I feel like I am already doing so much in this area. But what this goal is getting at is my need to reach a wider audience. I cannot rely on my school alone to get my ideas out in the world. I need to publish, record and get on the road.
Traveling is truly very hard on me physically, so I definitely need to build more core strength. I can also put my technical skills to work by experimenting with other media besides books.
And I need time and space for singing and songwriting. And some new poems wouldn’t hurt either. I honestly cannot remember the last poem I wrote, it feels like it has been such a long time since I answered the call of my poetic muse.
One technique I tried flat out did not work. I burned out trying to work on my book every single day. It may work for other writers, but I fell hopelessly behind in everything else in my life. All my juice was used up within four or five hours of waking, which made it very hard to do things like teach, read, design or even just think about anything clearly after 1 pm daily.
I kept trying to figure out what was wrong late last year after I returned from Between the Worlds. But what finally dawned on me was that I was suffering from a case of pretty severe burn out. I managed to end one school year and start another one, and do a lot of amazing things while simultaneously living almost daily in a state of complete and utter exhaustion.
Even now, it is really difficult to write or think clearly. The class I taught a week ago was possible only because I could muster enough inner will to slog through it but by the time the class ended, I could no longer even think straight. My students hopefully had no idea how tired I was as I explained the intricacies of qabalistic reflection and symbolism.
So this year, I need to sharpen my focus some in my writings and stop dragging my feet in the publishing arena. I still need to figure out how to approach my book writing while leaving me some juice for the rest of my life. It really sucks having an illness that limits your energy output, but it has taught me a great deal about the need for planning, priorities and choices.
One idea is to stop sitting on the stuff that is in fact ready to be published. Another idea is to capture the teachings from Reflections in a written form. I also need to let people know that I am willing to travel so I have opportunities to teach in areas beyond DC. Weekend workshops and one-day classes on-the-road can be tailored to be okay with my metabolism. Week long festivals and hectic fast paced conferences do not work as well for me physically. And who knows maybe a regular podcast in addition to my blog might be in my future
Pagan Monastery And Temple
I often talk about the need for a pagan temple, but I realized that I seldom mention the monastery. In many ways I have created my dream right here in my home with Reflections. The whole house is my temple and monastery in many ways.
But my long term goal is a larger structure right here in the city, where people could visit during lunch or after work to light a candle, say a prayer, sit in silent contemplation or join in a service just like many folks do at many of the older churches around town. A respite from the world of stress dedicated to the gods and goddesses of old.
And I also want a monastery, where people who are committed to the work of the temple anchor the magic and offer space for others to take a respite from time to time. Many Buddhist monasteries allow folks to stay for varied amounts of time and this allows folks to participate in the life of a working monastery.
That is what I want for pagans. But I want it in an urban setting. Why? Because, I believe that is where it is needed the most. The cities need dedicated sacred space in the midst of the stress and density of urban life. People need the gods close by, and the gods need to be anchored where people actually live.
I feel like my school and tradition needs to reach a critical mass before we can manifest a place to call our own. I also realize that we may need to work in concert with others to make it a reality. An urban temple could fulfill so many needs within our community. I should probably investigate how others have approached this issue in other faith traditions and paths.
My annual goals in this area are focused more on building my tradition and school. I will continue to scan however for more information about modern urban monasteries and how other traditions developed and evolved over time.
2008 Goals
- Psychology & Magick book proposal, final draft and literary agent
- Self publish two collections, Descent & Vocation
- Teach two classes or workshops out of town
- Document and publish Reflections teachings
- 2009 weekend intensive for Presidents Day weekend 09
Ongoing
- Reflections Mystery School
- Connect DC (public ritual group)
- Dark Flame Coven
- Elder / Mentor / Clergy (various communities)
Posted in
Submitted by katrina on Mon, 01/21/2008 - 8:23pm.
Wish I could be there. Very well spoken.
Katrina,
I wish you all the blessings and power you need on your journey. Thank you for these words. It is good to remember that returning to work (and thus returning to grace) bring a chance for us all to rest and have joy.
Wishing you joy in the Work.
David
Dear Katrina- Thorn reposted your blog and happy am I. Your passion, always so immense, comes blowing out in these words. So akin to my own heart and soul that it makes me have a bittersweet smile.
The Storm is only now coming to the edges of our universe and yet it will sweep and consume all that is. In the end, our beautiful universe will be so much...more? Different? Complete? Who knows?
All I do know is my soul came here to witness and be part in this period. I cannot shrink from the work. I am here with you, fae sister!
Thought-provoking piece, Katrina. Thanks.
I don't know what to call myself either. In Pagandom, I've taken to referring to myself as a Witch at Large. In the interfaith world where I'm active, I call myself a Pagan. Sometimes I call myself an uppity woman or a Second Wave Feminist. I've never really thought to publicly identify myself by my sexuality, het woman, which is very "white bread" and old-fashioned. Not only het, but serially monogamous for the most part. It seems almost a liability these days to say you're het, but I am proudly and happily so. I tend towards intellectualism but only have a BA, which doesn't carry much weight, at least in public and professional worlds, no matter how much you've studied, trained, and can articulate, even teach.
My biological heritage is Irish, Dutch, French Huguenot, Euro-mongrel. My social heritage is Roman Catholic on one side and conservative Methodist, temperance-crusading, women's rights and education on the other, with distinct East Coast sensibilities, now mellowed by more than half a century living on the Left Coast. My maternal political heritage is conservative Republican (altho what my relatives might think of current trends in the GOP I cannot imagine, since they did have brains and they did think and they did have a social conscience), yet I am much farther left in my outlook than any elected official I know. My paternal political heritage is blue collar Democratic, except that my dad broke with his family on politics and allied with my mother's family's conservatism.
I'm a former hippie, a home-birth advocate, a home death and green burial advocate, an opponent of capital punishment and resorting to warfare to resolve humankind's differences. I support the right to conscious self-deliverance. I rejoice in any and all consensual expressions of love and eros. I'm a lover and a mom.
I have never missed voting in an election and I disrespect those who don't avail themselves of this hard-won right. (I have ancestors who fought the Brits in the American Revolution.) I support workers' rights. I recognize our interdependence on this planet, so could be called a greenie. I'm a committed environmentalist in my day-to-day life (in terms of eating locally grown food, expanding public transit, recycling, preserving open space and wildlife, opposing exploitation of natural resources [strip mining, oil-drilling, nuclear facilities, agribusiness, monocultures, clear-cutting timber, overuse of pesticides, genetic modification, etc.]) I want to make the city streets "safe for dancing," as my old friend Tony Serra said when he ran for mayor of SF on the Platypus Party ticket.
Well, you got me going there, my friend. Thought-provoking read, as I said. ;-)
xo,
Macha
Lovely azaleas!
[cough][gag][snort][sneeze]
Just lovely...
I know what you mean.
I feel you. There is too much bs- particularly when people decide that their temperament is tantamount to truthful and ignore everyone else.
I get irked by immature extroverts or closet introverts who ignore you REPEATEDLY and then pretend you're out of line for being upset by the time they can't pretend you didn't say anything anymore. I find that the same people will ignore you if you blow up right away, too, and that it's because they just don't think that honoring what you value is important to maintaining a relationship, or even worse: that you don't know what you value at all and that it's all a mind game for their pleasure or annoyance. Then they call you passive-aggressive, aggressive, moody, touchy and temperamental. I call them "not listening".